Today was a therapy day. An hour in a day that can be used to get honest and tell what is true and necessary, or to try to hide and pretend all is as it should be. I began the process of becoming honest. It is a difficult process. One of the hardest parts in seeking what really is the truth, the truth about my needs, my desires, and my fear that I lack so many things.
I feel unworthy of care and love so often. Letting others care for me is a trial. If I cannot do for, be there for, and help out, what is the value of me? I am so grateful for the eyes of a third party. Grateful for the questions that are asked, the answers that are revealed and for the answers that are just left hanging, ruminating and swirling in my mind as I settle.
One thing that is becoming clear and that I am learning in the process, is that I am loved. Loved and cared for. By God, and by people in my life, not for what I can do for them, but just for who I am.