It was therapy day, I think my therapist’s goal in life is to get me to cry. We joke about it, but it is not all bad. Crying is very cleansing and it helps me know I am not dead inside. I feel things deeply, so deeply that it can be overwhelming.
I ask a lot from those close to me. I want them to connect emotionally, to be honest and open. I want to really know them, to have real relationships. I don’t ask this from everyone as not everyone is built this way. Casual chat and small talk has it’s place as well, but if one wants to be a part of my immediate circle, I require more from them than the easy banter of a surface connection.
I try to develop my circle and find it is a task, there are not many that like to have their insides mined for deep connection. There are not many that like to say the things that are hard or uncomfortable. The things that grow intimacy. So I wait for them to peek out at me and I test the waters. I ask questions and let them take it slow if needed. Depth can develop. The intimacy and the ability to be honest and open can blossom and these are the relationships that are worth having. The relationships that challenge and excite you, that make the cost of your time worth while.
I love looking for you, are you out there, aching to share, hoping to be known and to know another? If you are, let me see your bravery, the honest way you can speak up your energy and love for life. I cannot wait to hear what you might say.